THE DIOGENES REPORT
The Wit, Wisdom & Wituperation
of Emanuel L. Strunin
“a few steps ahead of the curve”
February 2004, VOL. IV, # 6
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ENSURING THE NEXT MIDDLE EAST WAR

The Bush Administration talks peace but it doesn’t act peace. The best example is the continual arming of the Egyptians with the most advanced military hardware including missiles that can hit Israel. America, and perhaps China, are arming Egypt with the most advanced offensive weapons available. And, even further, the U. S. is supplying highly advanced military hardware to countries like the United Arab Emirates and Kuwait—countries which are incapable of using such weapons. They can, however, and probably will transfer these weapons to an Arab country that is capable of using them—Egypt.

Arming the Egyptians—directly or indirectly-- is certain to lead to a major war in the Middle East. The American Government is doing everything within its power to make this a reality.

There is no geopolitical rationale for this American policy. Egypt is not being threatened by any of its neighbors. Of course, there is an economic motivation for the U. S.--to generate sales for American arms manufacturers. On the Egyptian side, there is no economic advantage to these arms purchases since Egypt continues to totter on the edge of bankruptcy. But there is a geopolitical motive. There is only one target for an armed Egypt—and it’s not the Moslem Brotherhood. It’s Israel, not Egypt’s other neighbors Libya, Sudan, Yemen or Jordan. Only Israel has the bullseye on its chest.

The foreign adventure ploy

A classic situation is developing—one that we have seen down through the ages. A country that is politically corrupt and economically bankrupt often embarks on foreign adventures to take the minds of its people off the situation at home. In addition there are groups in Egypt that are working to overthrow the current government. This is the portrait of Egypt with its decaying educational and manufacturing infrastructure; with its growing numbers of fundamentalists; with its thousands of university graduates each year who cannot find gainful employment; and with a leadership in the advanced stages of rigor mortis.

Instead of investing in systems to upgrade their economy and society, their limited resources are going into non-productive arms purchases. Egypt’s leaders would not be spending this money on armaments unless they had plans to use them. They still have the dream of accomplishing what they failed to do in 1967 and 1973—destroy Israel. 



Dreams of glory

There is also a more grandiose aspect to their desire for war. They hope to reclaim their so-called position as leader of the Arab world. And, now that the home of the caliphate is in disarray, they may even try to claim leadership of the Muslim world.

The Egyptian political and religious leaders and the media have been beating the drums of hatred and conflict for 30 years. So you can be certain that when the call comes, the Egyptian people will forget about their miserable existence and charge against the Jews with blood in their eyes.

The only question is who will strike first—Egypt or Israel. Unlike Yom Kippur 1973, Israel cannot afford to let Egypt with its advanced long-range weaponry launch the first strike. I trust Israel’s leaders will strike even before they did in1967 when they responded to Egyptian aggression. And this time Israel should wipe out Egypt’s 3rd Army, as well as its 1st and 2nd Armies without caving in to America’s and the UN’s call for a truce.



WAR OF IDEAS, OR LACK THEREOF

Uncle Tom (Friedman, that is) has been writing a series of columns with the title “”War of Ideas” in The Times (New York, that is). Not being a regular reader of that sheet, I just caught Part 6. Unsurprisingly, the tile of the column promises more than it delivers. Ideas are mainly noticeable by their absence. At least, he doesn’t throw in his usual knee-jerk “idea” for curing all the ills of the world—the dismantling of the “settlements.”

Uncle Tom isn’t alone in his analysis of the reasons behind the growth of Arab terrorism and fundamentalism. It’s the same reason that academics and government officials and the media pundits give for every problem faced by every society. The causes are always economic. Economic determinism is the philosophy of the generations that have been influenced by Karl Marx—although Marx himself was not an economic determinist. He recognized that a variety of factors influenced human and national behavior.

Economic determinism

So why this overwhelming enchantment with economic factors? Because many economic factors are easily measurable which saves the experts from deep thinking and creative analysis. For example Uncle Tom notes that many millions of Arab youth are unemployed and that an electronic map indicates that very few in the Muslim world are using Google to gain information. Voila. That’s why they hate the United States and that’s why they attacked the World Trade Center and the Pentagon and the American embassies in Africa.

Unfortunately for the economic determinists, all of the World Trade Center and the Pentagon bombers were educated and came from middle class or higher economic and social backgrounds. But why be surprised, revolutions are never led by the peasants, the unemployed or the disenfranchised. (Just think of Usama, Lenin, Castro, Washington, Jefferson and Jefferson Davis, not to overlook Moses.)

It’s easier to count the number of unemployed and these days, a lot more politically correct. It is very much more difficult to evaluate the psychological motivations of those that are driven to lead a “revolution” and exhort the unemployed to hate. Those psychological motivations, in most cases, have nothing to do with the level of unemployment among their countrymen.

We must have done something to them

In a more subtle way than the American critics and self-haters who responded to 9/11, with the cry “we must have done something to them,” Uncle Tom puts the onus on America and Europe for the anger, hatred and terrorism coming out of the Muslim world.
He calls for big investments from the West to build economic infrastructures in the Muslim nations so that their young people will have jobs. In my opinion, jobs will not diminish their hatred and terrorism. A billion dollar fortune did not deter Usama from becoming a master terrorist, nor did an M.D. degree deter his Egyptian mentor from following the same route.

The fundamentalists/terrorists are driven by deep emotional ties to their religion, which despite some few words advocating tolerance in their scriptures and commentaries, are brimming with disdain and hatred for the” infidels.” Ever increasing numbers of Islam’s clerics are fanning the flames of this hatred against America, Israel, Jews, Christians and the West, in general. Jobs, in the current environments in the Muslim world, are not the answer to the threat posed by these people. 

Economic and infrastructure investments that the seer of 41st Street calls for will disappear down the same Arab/Muslim rat holes that are the repositories of trillions of dollars and pounds and francs and marks of oil money. If the Muslims want to improve their condition, they shouldn’t be attacking the U.S., Israel or Europe, they should be attacking their own governments. Those planes should not have been flown into the WTC or the Pentagon, the should have hit the Grand Mosque in Mecca, Al-Azhar University in Cairo and even the Dome of the Rock and Al-Aqsa in Jerusalem.

Examine yourself

Until they turn their hatred inward, the Arabs/Muslims will not be ready for self improvement. They don’t hate the West for what “we did to them”, they hate us for what we are—superior in every way to their societies. And that won’t change with Uncle Tom’s proposed job program. The Muslims came to America and got jobs and yet are participants in the fundamentalist/pro-terror mosques that are the majority in this country.
Based on their lack of skills and education, the Muslims in Europe are at the bottom of the economic scale, yet they are better off than in their homelands. I don’ t see them rushing to return to their original homes. Yet fundamentalism and terror are growing phenomena among them.

Uncle Tom does admit that the “war of ideas” among Arabs and Muslims can only be fought and won by their own forces of moderation, and those forces can only emerge from a growing middle class....” While this would be an excellent turn of events in the days of the Messiah, I wouldn’t advise him to hang by his thumbs until it happens. Hatred, intolerance and ignorance are so rampant in the Arab/Muslim world that no voice of moderation dares to make itself heard. This is the reality of today’s world and since we have to live in today’s world, we have to go all out to stomp these enemies into the ground.



NAMES
Names that fit and names that don’t.

The pronunciation of the author’s name fits, but not the spelling. Barbara Seamon, author of “Sex, Pills & Relationships.”



HEADLINES AND COMMENTS
Headlines from the world’s press. Comments by Diogenes.

Bush Says He Is Undaunted By Drug Costs
His advice to seniors is to break each pill in half so the prescriptions lasts twice as long.

Pentagon Prepares For Several Base Closures
Too bad none of them are in Afghanistan or Iraq.

Bush To Back Off Some Initiatives For Budget Plan
Some back-off suggestions: rebuilding Iraq; strengthening marriage; going to the moon; and screwing drug-buying seniors.

Bush Job-Training Call Is Cruel Joke On Unemployed
Who said that George W. Bush doesn’t have a warped sense of humor?

Judge Orders Neil Bush DNA Test For Lawsuit
Will a judge order a Rorschach test for George W. Bush?

Pennsylvania, Maryland Slot Plans Worry Atlantic City
Why not, they’re looking to steal New Jersey’s gambling business.

Slowly, Doctors’ House Calls Are Making A Comeback
By the way, I can sell you some Oxy Contin pills cheap. With Medicare and insurance company cutbacks, we have to make a buck somehow.

244 Muslim Pilgrims Killed In Stampede
Beats the Calgary Stampede.

Scientists Create 2 New ‘Superheavy’ Elements
It’s true the whole world is getting fatter!

Bush To Establish Panel To Examine U.S. Intelligence
Great, as long as they don’t try to test the President’s I.Q.

The Talk Of Kabul: Women Sing On Television
Are they singing the old Rudyard Kipling song about Afghan women cutting up wounded British soldiers?

White Powder Found In Senate Building
1. From the way they walked, I knew the senators needed to use talcum powder.
2. Could it be Uncle Ben’s Ricin?

Gruesome Finds Prompt Review Of Postal Service
New guideline: when the mail piles up six feet high, suspect a dead body and call the cops.

Extra Police In Place After Movie Theater Violence
And that was just on-screen.

Donna Bunte Helps Balance Life & Health With Chinese Medicine & Acupuncture
I love Chinese therapy. I’ll have one from column A and two from Column B

Laser Vaginal Rejuvenation Helps Women Feel Young Again
Ideal for any woman who wants to exhibit herself during half-time at the Super Bowl.

Narragansett Indians Release Plans For $450M Casino In Rhode Island
This was always Roger Williams secret dream.

Top Scientist Confesses On TV To Selling Nuclear Secrets
He claims he did all by himself without the help of Pakistani generals. This guy knows what to say to be a survivor.

New Railcars Lose Out Under Rowland’s Plan
He couldn’t arrange kickbacks?

Stabbing Was An Accident Murder Suspect Testifies
The victim backed into her knife 33 times. Actually it was only three times.

Surgeons Successfully Remove Second Head Of Baby
They used to say that two heads are better than one.

Putin Urges Tolerance Toward Muslims
Except when you see them in the Moscow subway or when you’re killing them in Chechnya.

Lay Editor Defends Civil Tights Of Accused Priests
Hmm, lay editor.

Boston Reports Drop In Mass Attendance
Are the priests busy with other duties? Are the parents of young boys keeping them away? Or both?

Robotic Dogs Programmed With A Social Conscience
Why can’t they do the same with compassionate conservatives?

Legislature Has Different Standards For Misdeeds
If you’re a government official, stealing ain’t stealing.

Poll: Finish Probe Before Impeachment Vote
The citizens want enough evidence to hang the Governor, as well as impeach him.

Former President Says South Africa’s Democracy ‘Not Very Healthy’
Does he mean that one-man-one-vote isn’t working too well?

Charges Dropped In Sex Assault Case
The 89 year-old perpetrator kept begging that they shouldn’t drop the charges.

Casino Foes To Seek Laws Against Lobbying For Tribal Recognition
How come the ‘casino foes’ never complained about how the Bureau of Indian Affairs was treating the Indians?

Cable Giant Bids To Take Over Disney
Fee, Fie , Fo Fum

Concerns Voiced Over Blumenthal Gift Rules
The CT Attorney General wants state employees to give notification of gifts they received from contractors over the past 10 years. The head of the employees union says his members are worried about their recollection over the past decade. Diogenes asks is it the recollection or the collection.



QUOTES I LIKE
Diogenes considers them clever, not that he necessarily agrees with them.

I no longer need to punish, deceive, or compromise myself. Unless, of course, I want to stay employed.
- Shanti Goldstein

The brouhaha over the half-time action at the Super Bowl is a tempest in a ‘B’ cup.
- Anonymous
- 
Very Senior Citizen: I went out with a nurse last night.
Cosmo: You old dog!
Very Senior Citizen: Someday I hope I’m able to go out without one.
- SHOE (comic strip)

Before undergoing a surgical operation arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.
- Ambrose Bierce

One-man-one vote: a policy that was vital for South Africa; dangerous for Iraq; a club to hit Israel over the head with if it thinks of annexing Judea and Samaria; and, based on the Electoral College, not necessary for the United States. So what does one-man-one-vote really mean? Whatever you want it to mean.
- Diogenes

How often have we walked away from a conversation and said to ourselves, “I should have said?” This happened to me the other evening. Someone asked me if I have compassion for the Arabs. Instead of my long-winded answer, I should have said. “Compassion and diabetes are traditional Jewish diseases. I already have diabetes, I can’t afford to have compassion on top of that.”
- Diogenes

Almost 90 years ago, Thomas R. Marshall who was Vice-President under Woodrow Wilson came up with this clever observation: “Once there were two brothers. One ran away to sea, the other was elected Vice-President, and nothing was ever heard of either of them again.”

The current situation nudges Diogenes to modify Marshall’s observation. “Today one of those brothers is heard from regularly, except when he’s holed-up in his secret hideout or meeting with his oil company pals in Washington.. The one who ran away to sea has still not been heard from; the other, however, who was elected Vice-President in 2000, now runs this country.

The Arabs keep claiming that they are cousins of the Jews. The Jews are trying very hard to keep this from becoming public knowledge.
- Diogenes

The universe is full of magical things, patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.
- Eden Philpotts

To be right before the right time is heresy, sometimes to be paid for with martyrdom.
- Santiago Ramon y Cajal

I don’t want to buy the black vote; I just want to rent it for a day.
- Dick Harpootlian (white, former chairman of the South Carolina Democratic Party)

America is the greatest of opportunities and the worst of influences.
- George Santayana

No man can sit down and withhold his hands from the warfare against wrong and get peace from his acquiescence.
- Woodrow Wilson

Profanity furnishes a relief denied even to prayer.
- Mark Twain

Many men owe their success to their wives. I owe my wife to my success.
- Anonymous millionaire

Computer Wizard: I think I see the problem. There’s a faulty connection.
Cosmo: Where is it?
Computer Wizard: Somewhere between the chair and the keyboard.
- SHOE (comic strip)

Why is it that all the State Department and White House officials who live in gated communities with 24/7 guard services are opposed to Israel’s building a security fence?
- Diogenes

Comments welcome. e-mail to: editor@diogenesreport.com
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