THE DIOGENES REPORT
The Wit, Wisdom & Wituperation of Emanuel L. Strunin
“a few steps ahead of the curve”
August 2004, VOL. IV, # 28
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A HALLOWED TRADITION

Loud and clear in the cacophony of individual and media Bush-bashing is the claim that he is responsible for the first pre-emptive strike in America’s history. This claim is based on the problem that Americans do not have historical memory. Our national outlook is that if it happened more than two weeks ago, it didn’t happen. So let’s dredge up a little American history to set the record straight. 

The pre-emptive strike is a hallowed American tradition.

Does anyone remember America’s pre-emptive strike against North Viet Nam? It started with President Kennedy sending military “advisors.” Our involvement grew slowly but inexorably. Then came President Johnson’s big cock-and-bull story (the WMD excuse of its day), a Vietnamese junk attacked an American destroyer in the Tonkin Gulf, which led to the Tonkin Gulf Resolution (passed in the Senate 99-1), which led to ½ million Americans fighting in Viet Nam. See how easy it is to get our Congress to follow a pied piper in the White House. Then there was President Nixon’s foray into Cambodia. He didn’t even bother with Congress.

In 1917, we sent marines into Nicaragua—pre-emptively. We very likely had troops and “advisors” in other Central American and Caribbean countries on a pre-emptive basis.
I seem to remember Grenada and Cuban Bay of Pigs fiasco. Speaking of Cuba, I also “Remember the Maine.” What was our battleship doing in Havana harbor? In 1919, we sent troops to Siberia—it was just a foray. 

We did not even have to cross the ocean to use pre-emptive tactics. Am I correct in assuming that the Confederates launched a pre-emptive strike against Fort Sumter?
Or did Fort Sumter launch a pre-emptive strike against Johnny Reb? Was it 1812 or 1813 that we attacked Canada? And how many pre-emptive strikes did we launch against the 500 nations—dozens…hundreds?

So, don’t bash Bush for the pre-emptive strike against Iraq. But it’s OK to bash him for the brainless follow-up.



A PUBLIC SERVICE MESSAGE

I received the following and since I also feel strongly that we should support the supporters of a strong Israel and boycott the Israel haters and Jew haters, I am disseminating this message.

No doubt most of you have shopped at The Body Shop which is in every mall. I have too. But no more. The other night I was looking at a Body Shop product in my collection of stuff and happened to notice Arabic writing on the back. An acquaintance pointed out that the Arabic no doubt identified the product as it was below a long list of different languages doing just that. But there was no Hebrew. That bothered me so today I went to the company web site, www.the-body-shop.com <http://www.the-body-shop.com> and surfed it a bit. There, right on the company news page, was the announcement of a 2002 award to pro Palestinians in Israel seeking the right of return. As most of you know, the so-called right of return is the call of terrorists as it uncontrovertibly means the destruction of the Jewish state. There is absolutely no question about this cosmetics' company stand on this issue. You of course have to make your own decision, but The Body Shop will not see my money. Please check out the link above and go to company news. Also please pass this along to those you deem appropriate, including any Jewish agencies where you know someone. 


EGYPT: THE RISKY “ALLY” AND “PEACE PARTNER”

This article is longer than most printed in The Diogenes Report, but it tells an extremely vital story to Israel and the U. S. Since it originally appeared in The Jerusalem Post, I felt that it would carry somewhat more weight than the similar comments from Diogenes that have been running this year. In addition to its direct accusations about the hatred the Egyptian Government is preaching against Israel and the U. S. there is a strong implication that Egypt is an important contributor to Muslim terrorism much like the Saudi-sponsored madrassas. The article, “Willful Blindness in Gaza” by Caroline Glick appeared in the August 20, 2004 issue of the JP.


The drumbeat of anti-Semitic and anti-American incitement marches on in the Egyptian government-controlled press. In recent weeks, the media in Egypt has come out with a series of articles that, like the long and continuous stream of their poisonous predecessors, dehumanize Jews, and criminalize both Israel and the United States.

In one recent piece in the ruling National Democratic Party's newspaper
wrote a dirge of Holocaust denial entitled "The lie about the burning of the Jews." Like most Holocaust denials, this one argues that the Jews made up the Holocaust in order to blackmail the world into giving the Jews a state where they proceeded to carry out a "holocaust" against the Arabs.

In another article, in the government's religious magazine a long blood libel against the Jews which argued repeatedly that the Talmud demands that Jews murder non-Jews wherever they are to be found. And, of course, that Jews murder non-Jews in ritual killings to make Passover matzot.

Less graphically, two Egyptian government magazines, published articles claiming that US concern about the genocide being carried out in the Darfur region of Sudan is really just a ruse for Washington to gain control over the Sudanese oil fields.

If it weren't for the Middle East Media Research Institute's
painstaking translations of these articles, there would be almost no way for us to know about the Egyptian government's continuous campaign to hammer deep and enduring hatred of the Jews, Israel, and the US into the hearts and minds of the Egyptian people.

The Israeli government rarely bats an eyelash in response to these
expressions by Hosni Mubarak's media. It certainly doesn't link Israel's willingness to treat Egypt with deference to the cessation of this Nazi-like dehumanization of the Jewish people. And it doesn't seem to consider that the deep and abiding hatred for all things Jewish that is so studiously inculcated into the Egyptian consciousness may have policy implications for the stability of the cold war that exists between the two countries.

To the contrary, as Egyptians ingest their daily diet of venom, Israeli
generals are vigorously engaging their Egyptian counterparts in discussions on the role that the Egyptian military will play in a post-Israeli withdrawal Gaza.

Earlier this month a high-ranking delegation of Egyptian generals, led by Intelligence Chief Omar Suleiman, was treated to televised embraces by Defense Minister Shaul Mofaz and his underlings at the Defense Ministry. Next month, the generals are scheduled to fly to Cairo for a reciprocal visit. The aim of these friendly parleys is to work out the Egyptian role in Gaza after an IDF withdrawal.

Egypt's engagement of Israel is part of its two-pronged strategy for Gaza. At the same time that it discusses altering the 1979 treaty with Israel in a manner that will allow the Egyptian military to deploy up to 15,000 troops along the border with Israel, and perhaps in Gaza itself, it is holding discussions with the PA, Fatah, Hamas, and Islamic Jihad to put together a plan for what Gaza will look like after these terrorists take full control of the area.

Both Egyptian and Israeli sources involved in the bilateral security talks have informed the press that Egypt has laid down four conditions for its support for Sharon's unilateral Israeli retreat from Gaza. These conditions involve (1) the transfer of control over the 10-kilometer-long Gaza-Egypt border to Egypt; (2) full Palestinian control over the Rafah border terminal with Egypt, the PA airport in Dahaniya, and the Gaza seaport; (3) the reopening of the "safe passage" route connecting Gaza and Judea to enable uninhibited Palestinian travel through Israel; and (4) an Israeli commitment not to reoccupy or attack the Gaza Strip after an IDF withdrawal.

These demands, breathtaking in their effrontery, would endanger the national security of Israel. Yet Mofaz did not cancel the talks, indeed the government continues to behave as if the Egyptians are being helpful.

Maj. General (res.) Doron Almog, who commanded the Southern Command from 2000-03, authored an article in the current issue of The Middle East Quarterly entitled "Tunnel Vision in Gaza." Almog argues that transferring control over the Gaza-Egypt border, or the so-called Philadelphia corridor to the Egyptian military would be disastrous not merely to the stability of Gaza, which he claims is liable to quickly deteriorate into a "mini-Afghanistan" as a result. The move, he writes, could well destabilize the entire region by encouraging Egypt to abrogate the peace treaty.

Almog writes that Egyptian "tolerance for smuggling and infiltration, like anti-Israel demonstrations in Cairo and incitement in the media, appears to be designed to relieve some of the pressure exerted by anti-Israel public opinion in Egypt." Taking his analysis a step further, the Egyptian government encourages anti-Semitism and enables terrorism against Israel in order to promote domestic stability in Egypt itself.

As Almog notes, Egypt "is an authoritarian and inefficient state that has failed to meet even minimal goals of political and economic reform." If they didn't have Israel to hate, the frustration of Egyptians with the failure of their government to enable their national advancement and promote civil liberties would turn on the regime itself. So regime stability is dependent on anti-Semitism and support for Palestinian terrorism.

Given this state of affairs, Almog argues that Israel must not provide Egypt with a role in Gaza after the withdrawal. Rather, he concludes that Israel must retain total control of the international crossing points and border zones in Gaza even though doing so will provide the Palestinians with a rhetorical basis for claiming that Israel has not withdrawn. Like Hizbullah with the Sha'ba Farms, the Palestinians will use Israeli control of the borders to justify further terrorism emanating from Gaza itself. Almog's view of Egypt is strengthened by the Egyptian-brokered deal between the PA, Fatah, Hamas, and Islamic Jihad for the post-IDF withdrawal period in Gaza. Reports of the deal vary but they all boil down to a few common elements. Hamas, Fatah, and Islamic Jihad will not be dismantled. Rather, they will either continue to operate autonomously but in a coordinated manner with the PA militias, or they will join the Palestinian army in Gaza that Cairo is set to train. Terrorism against Israel will not cease, but its focal point will likely move to Judea and Samaria to provoke further Israeli retreats.

Several reports this week have claimed that Marwan Barghouti, the head of Fatah in Judea and Samaria who is now serving six consecutive life sentences in Israeli prison for six separate murder convictions of Israeli citizens, has played a large role in organizing the Egyptian-sponsored agreement. Yediot Aharonot reported this week that Barghouti, who is in solitary confinement, was able to conduct these negotiations with Hamas and Islamic Jihad leaders in Damascus and Beirut through meetings he has held in recent weeks with 48 different attorneys.

According to Ofer Lefler, the spokesman for Israel Prisons Service, prison authorities have no legal ability to prevent Barghouti from holding such meetings. But this is a willful misreading of the law. According to the Prisons Service Regulation 29(B), "if suspicion arises that a meeting between a prisoner and his lawyer will enable the commission of a crime that endangers the well-being or security of another person or the security of or well-being of the public or national security, the head of the Prisons Service or the prison warden may order the prevention or interruption of such a meeting." Barghoutis's actions are motivated by clear goals. He wishes to strengthen his own position and he wishes to continue to coordinate cooperation between Fatah, Islamic Jihad, and Hamas in the conduct of the war against Israel as he has been doing since the planning stages for the war in the summer of 2000.

Egypt's two-pronged strategy of engaging Israel and the terrorists in separate negotiations is also clear. Egypt wishes through its coordination of the various terror factions to promote relative stability in Gaza among Palestinian terrorist groups to prevent Palestinian refugees from moving into the Sinai.

At the same time, it wishes to provide a framework for cooperation to ensure that all terrorist factions remain directed against Israel and only Israel to prevent destabilization of Egypt and promote destabilization of Israel.

Finally, Egypt seeks to enhance its position in the Arab world by extending its support for global jihad from the diplomatic sphere to direct sponsorship of terror against Israel even as it wins plaudits for its "constructive role" from both Israel and the US.

While the impetus driving Egypt and Barghouti in their moves to turn Gaza into a "mini-Afghanistan" are clear, Israel's policies on the issue are incoherent yet familiar. In planning for the retreat from Gaza today, as with the Oslo accords 11 years ago and Israel's view of Egyptian intentions at the Suez Canal in 1973, Israel's strategic planners are seized by wishful thinking about the intentions of our enemies as we voluntarily abandon the means to defend ourselves. Those earlier strategic misconceptions based on fantasies caused us thousands of otherwise preventable deaths. We can only hope that our leaders and strategists will get wise to reality this time, before we are forced to pay yet another unthinkable price for their willful blindness to reality.



GRAMMAR AIN’T WHAT IT USED TO BE

The following examples of English as she is spoken in the White House was collected in a recent Doonesbury comic strip. Don’t blame Diogenes that George W. Bush is so quotable.)

“The illiteracy level our children are appalling.” - Jan.23, 2004

“I’m honored to shake the hand of a brave Iraqi citizen who has had his hand cut off by Saddam Hussein.” - May 25, 2004

“I love to bring people into the oval office…and say, this is where I office.” - 
Jan. 29, 2004

“Karen is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me.” - May 27, 2004

“ And most importantly, Alma Powell, secretary of Colin Powell, is with us.” - 
Jan.30, 2003

“Poor people aren’t necessarily killers. Just because you happen to be not rich doesn’t mean you’re willing to kill,” - May 19, 2003

“The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorize himself.” -Jan. 21, 2004



EVEN MORE JEWISH HUMOR

Hospitalized with a heart attack, the patient is visited by his Rabbi who offers these words of comfort: "I want you to know that the Executive Committee of the Beth Sholem Synagogue wishes you a speedy recovery by a vote of 11 to 3."

Toilet Seat - It isn't widely known, but the first toilet seat was invented by a Polish scientist in the 18th century. The invention was later modified by a Jewish inventor who put a hole in the seat.

Ten Commandments - The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a Courthouse! You cannot post "Thou Shall Not Steal," "Thou Shall Not Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians! It creates a hostile work environment.



HEADLINES AND COMMENTS
Headlines from the world’s press. Comments by Diogenes.

Report: N.Y. Synagogue On Al-Qaida List
Osama is not always up to date. The synagogue on his target list is the Eldridge Street Synagogue. I don’t think they’ve had a minyan there since 1927.

Gay Marriage Becomes a Swing Issue With Pull
Don’t get personal.

Israel Could Safely Withdraw From Golan, Army Chief Says
1. Which party does he plan to join when he retires from the army?
2. Does he like the Galilee?
3. How is his long-term memory? Does 1973 ring a bell?
4. When Israel withdrew from southern Lebanon, Hizbullah replaced them with 12,000 missiles. Is he trying to outdo Ehud Barak?

N.J. Man Accused of Aiding Terrorists Called 'Moderate'
He was a ‘moderate’ because he couldn’t learn to fly a plane. As Mark Twain wrote, “always use the exact word, not it’s second cousin.” Once again, the exact word is ‘terrorist’, not ‘moderate’.

Nader vs. The ADL 
He accuses the ADL, The President and Congress of being “puppets.” He should be asked how much of his funding is coming from Syria and Islamic charities.

Arafat Paid Netureui Karta "Rabbi"
It was just a tithe for his rebbe.

US Renews Calls For Syrian Withdrawal From Lebanon
Good idea, but let’s not jump in with American troops when the civil war restarts.

Conversion Outreach Plan Stirs Outrage:
Jews For Jesus Trains 600 Street Workers
Is that street workers or street walkers?

Presidential Libraries Getting Aggressive In Pursuit Of Visitors
1.Some of their promotional material advises potential visitors that they can speak loudly and even yell, they can cut pages out of books and even steal books, steal documents and pinch the behinds of lady librarians. 

2. The Bill Clinton Presidential Library will feature an “adults only” viewing room. 

Sharon Team Stuffed Ballot Box At Likud Party Conference
The fat man should be stuffed in a steamer trunk and shipped to Cairo.

Syria Condemns Terrorism
Except for the kind it approves

Wiccans In The Military Seek Moe Understanding, Tolerance
All military personnel should be made more sensitive to the prayer: 
Double, double, toil and trouble.

U.N. Members Says No To Sanctions In Sudan
Of course not, it’s only Arabs killing black Muslims. It would be different if it were Israelis abusing Muslims.

Folk Singer To Lend Support To 9/11 Event
Since it’s Pete Seeger, you might wonder which side he is supporting.

Leftist MK Sarid Hopes Bush Doesn't Win - Too Easy On Sharon
Workers of the world , unite! Even the radical left wing in Israel is supporting Kerry.

Dole Suggests Kerry Apologize
1. He should apologize for saying the Americans did bad things in Viet Nam, especially for the My Lai massacre.
2. With his Viagra contract, Dole may now have a stiff putz but he still is a mean spirited shmuck.

Ramsey Clark To Defend Saddam Hussein
Why not, he needs new clients and Stalin, Khrushchev and Brezhnev are dead, and Osama hasn’t been caught yet.

Bawdy Off-Broadway Play Deemed Unsuitable For GOP Convention Visitors
How come they suddenly got so prissy, the party has been fucking the middle class in public for years?



QUOTES I LIKE
Diogenes considers them clever, not that he necessarily agrees with them.

My mother grew up in a Hungarian village with 420 Jews. Only three of them survived the Holocaust. A stone now stands there, reading, 'In memory of the Jewish community that was taken.' Come to Israel - no one will 'take' you from here!
     - IDF Gen. Benny Ganz


Fortune Teller: I see a 300 game in your future!
Cosmo: My bowling team will be ecstatic!
Fortune Teller: Too bad it’ll be while you’re playing golf…
      - SHOE (comic strip)

There is a great ability in knowing how to conceal one’s ability.
      - La Rochefoucauld

Good advice is one of those injuries which a good man ought, if possible, to forgive, but at all events to forget at once.
     - Paul Chatfield

That Teresa Heinz Kerry is more than ketchup.
     - Diogenes



READERS’ COMMENTS

This is what Kerry judgment was in 1971 on the Dick Cavett show. Clearly he was wrong then and will be wrong today. He has been an opportunist that took his heavy movie camera to Vietnam and consistently a dove in his years in public life. Clearly the wrong judgment today will have terrible consequence for the free world and Israel.

Here is the transcript: 
MR. CAVETT: No one has said that there'll be a bloodbath if we pull out, which is a cliche we used to hear a lot. Does either of you still think there would be a – (bloodbath)?

MR. O'NEILL: I think if we pull out prematurely before a viable South Vietnamese government is established, that the record of the North Vietnamese in the past and the record of the Viet Cong in the area I served in at Operation [unintelligible] clearly indicates that's precisely what would happen in that country. 

MR. CAVETT: That's a guess, of course. 

MR. O'NEILL: I'd say that their record at Thua, at Daq Son [phonetic spelling], at a lot of other places, pretty clearly indicate that's precisely what would happen. Obviously, in Thua, we've discovered, how many, 5,700 graves so far, at Daq Son four or five hundred. 

MR. KERRY: The true fact of the matter is, Dick, that there's absolutely no guarantee that there would be a bloodbath. There's no guarantee that there wouldn't. One has to, obviously, conjecture on this. However, I think the arguments clearly indicate that there probably wouldn't be. 
First of all, if you read back historically, in 1950 the French made statements – there was a speech made by, I think it was General LeClerc, that if they pulled out, France pulled out, then there would be a bloodbath. That wasn't a bloodbath. The same for Algeria. There hasn't been. 
I think that it's really kind of a baiting argument. There is no interest on the part of the North Vietnamese to try to massacre the people once people have agreed to withdraw.
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You lost your marbles; if Bush is bad wait until Kerry will negotiate with the terrorists via Chirac.

Diogenes Responds: I’m trying to decide which one is worst. I’ll announce it to the world when I come to a decision.
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I cheered your report and the request to free Jonathan Pollard. I laughed heartily at the humor of court decisions which underscores the lunacy that runs our country. However, I think you have to seek understanding and forgiveness, as there is always more than one way to resolve problems in this world. Your last reader was correct in pleading for compassion and understanding. I would agree that dialog, not violence is a means to a peaceful resolution. The current political team will also draw more bloodshed and hurt anyone who disagrees. I speak from experience, as I wrote to the President to Free Pollard and received a very negative reply that leaves me wondering if I will receive a knock on the door and be arrested for being a verbal combatant. Thanks for sharing your wisdom.
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CORRECTION

According to two of my readers who authenticated their claims, the Stella Awards item, that I ran in the previous issue, while it was funny, was a hoax. There is a Stella Award but it did not include the cases included in the story I ran. I may try to be more careful next time in my selection of Internet material.


So says Diogenes. What do you say?  Click here to send in your comments 

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