THE DIOGENES REPORT
The Wit, Wisdom & Wituperation of Emanuel L. Strunin
“a few steps ahead of the curve”
June 2007, VOL. VII, #9
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(Items marked with an * were written by Diogenes.)

THEY NEED ANOTHER FRENCH REVOLUTION*

Before some of my readers jump all over me, I want to offer an analogy. Suppose you knew that your neighbor loaded his family—wife, three girls and two boys—into his SUV to drive them off a cliff. He had been getting nuttier and nuttier over the years and, now, finally announced his plan to end it all for all them immediately. Do you have an obligation to stop him from consummating this mass murder? I believe that you do. And if the only way you can prevent him from murdering his family—your neighbors—is by killing him, it’s your obligation to do it!

This is the scenario that I see taking place in Israel. It is led by the prime minister who is aided and abetted by the members of his cabinet, most members of the Knesset and many of the general officers of the IDF. Almost on a daily basis they are becoming more irrational, more out of touch with reality and moving Israel closer to the precipice. Just like the proverbial rats leaving the sinking ship, they will be the first to skip out when it becomes obvious that its enemies are overwhelming the nation. My guess is that many of them already have funds waiting for them in Switzerland, France, England and the USA.

That is why my answer to Israel’s international problems—not even considering the ethical and moral dry rot that is eating away at the country internally—is a French Revolution. The leaders of Israel should be carted away in trucks and executed not by guillotine necessarily, but by firing squads or hanging. Perhaps it will be difficult to find more capable and honest leaders in Israel, but those selected will have good reason not to follow the paths of their predecessors.

A French Revolution may seem like a harsh penalty but it is a penalty that fits the crimes that are being committed by Israel’s leaders and that are leading to the destruction of the Jewish state.


IF YOU FENCE THEM OUT YOU ARE A RACIST, ANTI-GLOBOLIZATION TRAITOR!!!*

I won’t predict how the “amnesty” bill will eventually go in Congress, but I will explain the motivation of the Bush Administration, previous administrations and their drumbeaters in the Senate and House. To them, a “bad” is better than no bill. A “bad” bill that won’t be enforced can be made to look like something is being done to protect us from the tide of illegal immigration. This is based on the theory that you can fool most of the people most of the time. Not passing a bill will make it obvious that nothing is being done to protect our borders and our workers. The American people are unhappy that nothing is being done but they are unhappier that they are being conned into believing that the amnesty bill will make it appear that something is being done..

Let’s begin by acknowledging that the Administration, led by el presidente, are prevaricating (a euphemism for lying) about the steps they will take to secure the border if this “amnesty” bill is passed. The supporters of the bill are either too stupid to understand this or they also are prevaricating. 

Nothing will be done by Republican or Democrat administrations to secure the border because they don’t want to stop the flood of immigrants from pouring into the country. That is why the security and employer responsibility provisions of the 1986 bill were not enforced. That’s why any border security provisions, no matter how weak, will not be enforced. 

One of the arguments for encouraging illegal immigration is that Americans don’t want the jobs that the illegals take. Pay Americans an American wage and they will take most of those jobs. That’s what happened when the Immigration Service removed the illegals from the Swift meatpacking plants. Americans were standing in line to take back their $18 an hour “undesirable jobs”-- when the minimum wage—or less—illegals were rounded up.

Have you seen the TV commercials from a Texas business group asking who’s going to pick your cotton and beans, who’s going to mow your lawn? What they don’t say, of course, who’s going to accept $5 an hour if we can’t hire illegals? And when these illegals get too smart, the farmers, ranchers and factory owners will need new illegals. That’s why the border will never be closed. At least until there are no more peons left in Latin America. After that, they will bring in Africans, even if they have to chain them on slave ships under the guise of saving them from a terrible existence in their native lands.

That’s why America’s businessmen—whether from factory or farm—want to protect the status quo of untrammeled illegal immigration. And that’s why their agents in Congress and elsewhere support the status quo. Since most of the American voters are unhappy with the status quo, legislation that is supposed to fix the problem (but really doesn’t) is being used to blow smoke in the eyes of the voters.

What can we see (and hear) on the horizon?

As we have changed our menu, please listen carefully…
Push 1 for Spanish;
push 2 for Spanish; 
push 3 for Spanish. 
Any other languages?
Sorry about that:
Push 4 for Portuguese;
Push 5 for options of Arab dialects;
Push 6 for options of African languages;
Push 7 for Mandarin;
Push 8 for Cantonese;
Push 9 for Korean;
Push 1-0 for Hindi;
Push 1-1 for options of other Indian languages;
Haven’t you forgotten another important language?
Of course:
Push 1-2 for Black English;
Push 1-3 for Jamaican English;
Push 1-4 for options of other Caribbean English dialects;
And for our final option:
Push 1-5 for plain old English.
Bzzzzzzz….
Oops, you’re disconnected.



RAISE YOUR LEFT HAND*
If you don’t want to hear any more crap about:
• Paris Hilton
• The Phil Spector trial
• Prince Harry and the other prince
• The Survivor
• American Idol
• The faith of the presidential candidates
• Which baseball players are on steroids
• Which football players beat their wives or girlfriends
• Rosie O’Donnell
• The term ”partner” when it’s not related to business
• How many kids Angelina Jolie has adopted
• How much good Wal-Mart is doing in its communities
• All the things the oil companies are doing to solve the energy crisis
• Drugs that will kill you in a hundred horrible ways while they are removing your zits
• The Hollywood stars that are on the divorce-marriage carousel
• Islam means peace
• An inner city school bragging that it has taught 30% of its pupils to read and write
• Marriage rights for homosexuals
• I pods and cell phones that can do everything except wipe your…oops, I spoke to soon



HEADLINES AND COMMENTS*
Headlines from the world’s press. Comments by Diogenes

Bush says Russia won't attack Europe
The President doesn’t need a crystal ball; all he has to do is look into Putin’s eyes.

Bush Meets Pope, Promotes U.S. AIDS Work
Is this just for priests and altar boys?

Shas Sages Decide: 'Shimon Peres for President'
1. I guess that the people who claim that the Arab Jews (the Sephardim) are not too bright are on to something.
2. Did I hear that sages will do anything for a few shekels?
3. Reward the betrayer of Jonathan Pollard with the presidency of Israel.
4. Israel can be proud of its presidents—a rapist followed by a betrayer who works overtime at betraying patriots and the goals of Zionism.
5. Is there room for any more blots on the reputation of Israel’s leaders?

Fighting In Lebanese Refugee Camp Rages, And Spreads
Why is it OK for Arabs to kill Arab terrorists, but not OK for Jews?

Romney’s Run Has Mormons Wary Of Scrutiny
Are they afraid that their three wives will find out how many more wives their husbands have?

Outspoken Political Scientist Denied Tenure At DePaul
1. Calling Norman Finklestein a Political Scientist is like calling a terrorist, a freedom fighter.
2. His career was built on criticizing holocaust survivors for demanding “too much” in reparations or “living” off the holocaust. His entire career was based on his living off the holocaust. 
. 
British Professors Approve Israel Boycott
Does this mean that they won’t participate in the gay march in Jerusalem?

Dovish Groups Mull Mega-Merger In Bid To Build Peace Powerhouse
You can be certain that these folks will ignore the need for peace in Baghdad or Kabul; these are the “process” people whose only interest is to turn the Jewish state into a Swiss cheese. 

Army Missed Its May Goal For Recruits
You think our army missed? You should see by how much the Iraqi army missed.
How come al Qaeda never seems to miss its recruiting goals?

Greenspan not worried Chinese will dump Treasuries
He’s got his money in gold.

EU Breaks Freeze On Funding PA
The Europeans are funding the Arab terrorists in Israel. For their next act they may replace the Saudis as the leading financial supporters of al Qaeda.



QUOTES
Diogenes considers them clever, stupid and/or informative, 
not that he necessarily agrees with them.

Don’t underestimate George W. Bush. He came up with a way to counteract global warming. He is reviving the Cold War.
- Diogenes

The democrats are discovering that you can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s earmark.
- Diogenes

Inside of this fat man (me) there’s a fatter man fighting to get out.
- Diogenes

Ever since Abraham discovered a God outside of space and time, theologians have been trying to push God back into space and scientists have been trying to push God back into time.
- Diogenes

Listening to a Dow Chemical commercial, I thought they said chemistry eliminates humanity. After all, I said to myself, Dow did produce Agent Orange. But on a closer listening, I realized that they said chemistry illuminates humanity. The following quote probably helped establish my mindset.
- Diogenes

Exposure to dioxin is usually not disabling but may be fatal.
- Dow Chemical Company report

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
- Douglas Adams

If English was good enough for Jesus Christ, it’s good enough for me.
- Congressman David Edwards (on whether a commercial nation needs to be multilingual) 

The U.S. should send along a qualified ophthalmologist with Bush the next time he wants to look into Putin’s eyes.
- Diogenes

I desire what is good. Therefore, everyone who does not agree with me is a traitor.
- George III of England

I desire what is good. Therefore, everyone who does not agree with me is a traitor.
- George III of the United States

If Lincoln were alive today, he’d roll over in his grave.
- Gerald Ford

Pontius Pilate’s last words to Jesus: “You’ll never eat supper—or lunch—in this town again.”
- Diogenes

Criticism of our contemporaries is not criticism; it is conversation.
- Lemaitre

Animals have these advantages over man: they never hear the clock strike, they die without any idea of death, they have no theologians to instruct them, their last moments are not disturbed by unwelcome and unpleasant ceremonies, their funerals cost them nothing, and no one starts lawsuits over their wills.
- Voltaire


READERS’ COMMENTS

Re: Vol. VII, #8

Interesting that LIKUD spelled backwards is: DUKIL (do kill). That's how to handle the enemy.

Diogenes’ Response

If you can’t get the job done going forward, do it from the rear, as long as you get it done.



Visit my new blog, DIOGENES # XXI at http://diogenesxxi.blogspot.com/


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